The Saga Begins

So, offspring number one just turned four in January. She is clearly (to me, and my husband, and who knows who else) gifted; we just don't know to what level yet. She is one of those more stereotypically academic gifted children. Knew her ABCs at 18 months and a host of other things. Currently can fairly easily read at a 5th/6th grade level with pretty decent comprehension. Blows through 2nd/3rd grade books like they're nothing. And she's four. I've done so much reading about schooling options and my anxiety on the subject grows, the older she gets. I've already posted here about some of my negative experiences in public school. I've read many horror stories on gifted webpages and forums about the lack of support for gifted children in school systems. Don't get me wrong - I think most teachers are great, and they care about children. They're certainly not in it for the money. But, I also think the general system is what fails children. Between class room sizes, testing and a general lack of knowledge GIVEN to teachers ABOUT gifted children. So, I agreed, like a reasonable person, to give the local public school a chance and at least check it out. It's very early still, but if we are going to consider some of the upper end private schools, we have to get her on a list far before she's actually ready to go to school.

So, today we went up to the elementary school in our neighborhood to meet with the principal. My overall initial impression was it was 'fine'. Neither terrible or impressive. But, the more I think about it, the more irritated I become at some of the comments. It's entirely possible my own view point colors some things in a more negative light, but I don't think it's all me. One of the things that just really sticks out to me, is kind of how she framed up the whole thing. Firstly, there is very minimal enrichment available prior to the 3rd grade. She mentioned something about how it's not uncommon for a FIRST GRADER to read at a third grade level. Okay, well that's nice, but my FOUR year old currently flies through a 3rd grade book..so who knows where she'll be in another 2-3 years! But, she basically tells us in some very convoluted way that they group smart kids together but sometimes kids just have to realize life's not fair, or however she framed it up. But, what if I came in there with a special needs kid (which may very well be the truth in a few years, we don't know yet). Would we be told 'Hey, we'll make a few minimal strides to help your kid, but they just need to realize now that life isn't fair'. Uh? How would people react to that if it was for a child behind the curve and not ahead of the curve? It already starts to make me feel like I'm starting to relive my own school years. I am really trying to keep an open mind and not be defensive, but she also made comments that almost insinuated we were trying to 'push' our child. Like there's something wrong with wanting my child to make the most use of her natural intelligence. She LOVES to learn. I've never pushed her once. She is very self motivated. The word 'socialization' was also thrown around in regards to comparing smaller class rooms (we didn't even bring up that terrible homeschooling idea). Ugh, I hate that word, I really do. As someone who was homeschooled and happens to be perfectly adept at socializing with other humans, I scoff at those concerns. Anyway, the whole thing has me crabby. And it's only beginning. Hopefully the next chapter will bring a better experience.

Rivers Running Over

There are rivers of poetry running through my head at the most inopportune times. I can write entire novels lying in bed in the middle of the night, but by the time I get to the place that I can try and write them down, I just stare at a blank page. It seems to happen with every creative idea I come up, or even with thoughts and feelings I'd like to extract. Maybe that's a summary of my life all together. All these great plans and ideas are running through my head and yet I feel like I am able to accomplish such a small number of them. I guess that brings me to a recent self revelation. I'm not sure that I'm actually an A type. I feel like I'm not actually organized enough to be a true 'Type A'. I CAN be organized, but then I look at all the places I fail to be organized in my life and I go 'What's wrong with me? Why don't I live up to this label?'

Then I forgot all about finishing this thought. Unsurprising. Maybe I will later. But, maybe never.

The Spaces In Between

I actually write posts for this blog all the time. In my head. They just never make it to the blog. Someday, maybe?

I need to organize this jumbled mess.